"I looked up at my mother."But if it's upsetting you, I'll stop being silly now."They nodded in unison, "Okay, but mummy's got to stop crying." I've s...opped, look."They did, and she had."You've got to kiss each other," Jenny said seriously. She wasn't at all impressed when I pecked mum's cheek."No." she protested. "You've got to do it properly, like on the television."Laughing, we put our arms around each other and touched lips."Properly." the twins chorused."Bloody monsters." mum laughed, but. I guess it's because the girls had begged me all afternoon. But , sure as shit I was sitting on the front row with all the other road whores. I was just sitting there drinking a beer when I noticed the lead singer staring....Wait, nah, guys like that don't take a second look at women like me; ordinary, everday, mother of 2, secretary for a hotel exec. Nope, he was looking at Elizabeth. Yeah, that's it. She's a hottie with great legs & big fake boobs. But I took a second look just to be sure. Oh. Wo puri tarah dari hui thi aur uski aankho se pani aa raha tha wo boli bhai nahi ye main nahi hu. Maine bola dekh tu sach sach bata de main papa mummy ko nahi batauga wo rote rote boli ki bahi main sach bol rahi hu ki ye photo meri nahi hai maine bola dekh sach bol de ho skta hai main teri madad kar saku wo boli ki bahi sachi me ye koi aur hai main nahi hu aur pls tu is photo ke baare me mummy papa ko mat bataioo maine bola ki iska matlab ye teri hi photo hai wo boli ki nahi sach me ye meri. Do you understand what I'm saying, Barry?"Mrs Templeton always used lots of big words when she talked. "I'm a verynaughty boy, Mrs Templeton?" I said."That's an understatement," she said. "Your mother has adopted a ratherunorthodox method of controlling your behaviour, borne out ofdesperation. Whilst I harbour certain doubts as to its efficacy, Ibelieve her strategy is not without a modicum of merit. I have thereforeagreed to provide my full co-operation."Mrs Templeton stood up. "Your mother.
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